Planetary Pranks

Tales of the Monolith Part III

“If it is just us, seems like an awful waste of space.”

– Carl Sagan

Popular opinions about the possibility of alien life suggests that our mysterious Universe-mates are either omniscient and wise, intent on contacting us to provide enlightenment, or just the opposite, hostile and violent, hell bent on killing us and taking our planet for their own. If the latter was true, it seems self-evident that we would no longer be speculating about it, unless, of course, the worst is yet to come. Indeed, maybe all of the supposed signs and symbols that alien races have been leaving for us over the eons have really been hiding warnings, and not encoding the secrets of the Universe.

Or maybe we’ve got it all wrong. Perhaps the aliens have a wicked sense of humor and are just out having a bit of fun at their dumb neighbor’s expense. Like those aliens named Doug Bower and Dave Chorley, two guys who in the nineties confessed to having made over two hundred intricate crop circles in the fields of Southern England over the prior twenty years, inspiring all manner of occult and extraterrestrial fandom and obsession. These pranksters remind me of Osamu Kasho’s newest work, “Something or Nothing”, a cute little box featuring a space ship hovering over a pattern of crop circles. Can you read the signs, solve the mystery, and access the secret chamber of the aliens? Is there something there, or … is Kasho just playing with us?

Osamu relates that he struggled to make the main locking mechanism for this puzzle box, which originally worked with a magnet. Despite this, however, the box opened almost automatically, making it far too easy. He eventually solved the problem with a clever idea, which made the magnet unnecessary and added another tricky element to the solution. He also envisioned having something that floated on a stick for the top of the box, and the idea of a UFO came to him. He thought it was mysterious, and that puzzle collectors would like that. Apparently he is an excellent judge of human psychology, because UFOs have been captivating our imagination for eons. Kasho has certainly been captivating our imagination since his first puzzle box design, at any rate, and his UFO is a charming addition piloted by little pranksters.

Despite their antics, these aliens are rather sophisticated when it comes to cocktails. It would not be unexpected to see them drinking martinis while planning their next fly by or abduction. Of course, we would expect such advanced life forms to enjoy something a bit more interstellar than a merely mundane martini. Which brings us to the Jupiter, a vintage martini variation with a few subtle and sophisticated twists. The cocktail is first mentioned in Harry McElhone’s ABC of Mixing Cocktail, 1923, supporting the notion that this gray-lavender blue planetary potion was popular in the roaring twenties.

The delicate bluish hue of this drink likely refers to the purview of the Roman deity Jupiter, moody god of the sky, rather than the planet bearing his name, but let’s be a bit more open minded, people. It’s not easy to figure out what aliens might like to drink and we are doing the best we can. With that in mind, we had to get creative with the Jupiter’s defining ingredient, Parfait d’Amour. Parfait Amour, or “Perfect Love”, as it was known in England, is a purple tinted liqueur which the House of Bols claims to have invented in the early nineteenth century. Various formulas derived from roses, violets, citrus, vanilla and almonds exist, although there is evidence that it was originally flavored with coriander and cloves – quite different from the flowery, perfumed potion it became. But Parfait Amour is significantly more complex than its common substitute, crème de violet or Crème Yvette. When faced with a vintage classic that calls for a single barspoon, and a bunch of thirsty aliens, for that matter, I highly recommend making a homemade version from ingredients on hand. I did so with Italicus (a rose and citrus liqueur), Crème Yvette, and amaretto, and the results were, dare I say, out of this world. Cheers!

Jupiter (c. 1923)

1 ½ oz gin

¾ oz dry vermouth

1 barspoon parfait amour*

1 barspoon orange juice

Shake with ice and strain into a favorite glass. Jupiter lemon wheel garnish.

*Homemade Parfait Amour – mix 2 parts ltalicus, 1 part Crème Yvette (or crème de violet) and ½ part amaretto

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BOXES AND BOOZE